Emotions are Like Children
This is one of the concepts that clicked for me in therapy. I started to envision my emotions as kiddos that needed my attention. I was seeing them as children that needed me to sit down beside them and listen to what they have to say. It reminds me of my favorite form of therapy, IFS – Internal Family Systems. I won’t get into that here because I could write lots of posts on just this. I want to explore together what it might look like to meet these children in our minds. I want you to imagine this is a child you might sit down beside. Maybe you let them know you see them and appreciate the hard work they do. You can let them know you hear them and are there for them.
Joy
- Oh my goodness! I love this song. [reminds us that we enjoy what we are doing right now]
- I am wearing my favorite clothes, and I feel so good in them. does a twirl to show off a skirt [lets you know what things are your favorite]
- I want us to go see our friend again. It was a blast hanging out with them. It made me smile so big! [shows you who you like to be around and who fills your cup]
Sadness
- Can you hold me please? [shows you it needs to be felt]
- I feel all drippy inside, and it is starting to come out of my eyes. [might lead to tears]
- lots of sniffles [telling you that something is not right and it hurts]
- blows nose into your shirt
- I need my stuffy. I want to hold it tight and never let it go. [lets you know you need some comfort items right now]
Fear
- Oh no. We are not going up there. Did you see how high up it is? [reacts to perceived danger]
- I heard growling coming from that corner over there. I definitely think we need to leave this room. Like right now! [reacts to actual danger]
- They look like they are mad at us. We should avoid talking to them. I don’t think they want to be friends anymore. [reacts to perceived emotions]
Anger
- That person was so mean. They didn’t treat me right, and I don’t want to ever be treated like that again. [shows us where a boundary was crossed]
- Hey! That’s not fair. Why do they get to sit with you and not me first? [reacts to perceived injustice or real injustice]
- That little girl just hit my friend. I am going to get her back! [reacts when loved ones are hurt by others]
Disgust
- Eww. Get that broccoli away from me! You know we don’t eat that! [lets us know what we do not like]
- What is that smell??? We need to put on some smell good stuff right away! [tells us when something isn’t right for us or we need to change]
- Did you hear how those two girls talk to each other? I never want to talk to someone like that. [lets us know what we do not want to be like]
It can be a great exercise in self-awareness to sit with our emotions. Hopefully you recognized some of the purpose of emotions as well. Don’t be afraid to view your emotions as children as they come up. That can remind you to give them the time and space they need. Practice as needed. With love.
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